Top 5 Copywriting Crimes Committed On Valentine’s Day

In order of retinal discomfort caused.

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Image for post
Image via Pomelo

#5

Kiss [these deals, this sale, etc] goodbye.

[Stares directly at camera]

#4

Any mention whatsoever of “single ladies” or “galentines”

Ugggghhhhhhhhhhhhh.

#3

Feel the love, for the love of, deals you’ll love, nothing says love like

Deliver me from obvious theme.

#2

Be our Valentine

No, Karen, I don’t think I will.

And #1, for the cheap seats in the back…

Roses are red, violets are blue, LITERALLY ANY OTHER WORDS THAT COME AFTER THIS HOW ARE YOU STILL USING THIS OCTOGENARIAN?!?

Bonus: A few Valentine’s Day-related subject lines I sort of enjoyed. A few marketing moments crossed my inbox that made feel pretty good about the still-beating heart of creativity, wit, and the worm-on-hook art that is subject line writing.

Winky Lux: Roses? Boring. Make it personal.

Two things I love. Pointing out the obvious, and brevity.

Drybar: Love is in the hair!

I also love a good pun, I’m only human.

Pomelo: Single Or Taken

I like the directness of this and the fact that it is a statement, rather than a question. As if to say, single or taken, we’re all shopping the same crap during this useless holiday, we get it. A good even playing field, if you will.

Written by

NPR once called me a humor essayist, let’s go with that. Host of A Single Serving Podcast. shanisilver[at]gmail

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