“Single People Shouldn’t Have Costco Memberships”

As if $6.99 Prosecco only belongs to the marrieds.

Photo of the author’s own Costco membership card.

By now we’ve established that I use our internet to air grievances in a way that is fiscally beneficial. “May whatever hurts my feelings make me money” is not only a motto, it’s a tax bracket. I have one small addendum to this adage, and that is, “If you hurt the feelings of a single woman and I hear about it, I’ll not only make