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Single People Are Not The Family Joke

Shani Silver
7 min readNov 25, 2024

Happy Holidays.

Photo actually taken on a Thanksgiving walk.

Tension is coming. Long rows of place settings dotted by trivets labeled with post it notes. A slight dip in height where we had to dust off a folding table from the garage. People will gather, familiar dishes will be shared, new dishes will be criticized. And eventually we’ll get around to the part of the conversation that separates the white from the yolk, that reminds the room of how different, and immovable we all are when it comes to topics like politics, religion, or our ideas of who is worthy of human rights and respect. Tension does not feel good, particularly among those who are supposed to effortlessly, naturally love each other. But rather than resolving it with emotional maturity, we deflect it and offer relief to everyone in the room through the one thing that can almost universally soothe: humor. When you’ve got one in the family who’s single past the age the collective feels it’s appropriate to be unwed, there’s no easier tension breaker than that.

“So, Emily, still single? Whatsa matter with you, can’t keep one around?”

“Emily, tell us about your dating life! What’s that app you use, Bubble?”

“I could never be single these days, I don’t know how you do it, Em!”

“Emily, go on any good dates lately? Tell us a good story!”

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Shani Silver
Shani Silver

Written by Shani Silver

Author, podcaster. shanisilver@gmail

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