Picking A Fight With The PR Industry

Shani Silver
6 min readJan 10, 2023

They—most certainly—started it.

Photo by Shani Silver

It’s mine, it’s not the first inbox assaulted. It is however the end of my silence on the topic. My work takes me to public spaces, and my email isn’t hard to find because I don’t want it to be. I understand that this will involve a certain amount of unwanted correspondence, most often from people just dying to improve my Google rankings. On occasion, it will also include PR industry cold calls trying to sell me on their client as a guest for my podcast. In these situations I need you to know that little to zero research on what my podcast actually is has been conducted. How do I know? Friend...

Most recently, I’ve had my digital doorbell rung thrice in one week in hopes of booking a male “personal development writer and anxious attachment style coach,” with the following pitch:

“Have you considered doing an episode about “How to find the right romantic partner?” or “Attachment styles/attachment theory anxiety in relationships” for your audience?”

A word on my podcast: It doesn’t cover these things. It actually covers the exact fucking opposite. I’ll dive deeply:

“How to find the right romantic partner?”

Okay. God. Fine. Listen to me clearly, no one, and I mean no one on this earth, least of all a man in his late twenties, can tell you how to find the right romantic partner. No one, actually no one knows who your partner is or where they are “hiding.” To proclaim otherwise is akin to selling yourself as a psychic, but we all love to casually overlook that because singlehood is so deeply shamed that singles—sorry, single women—are desperate to listen to, and pay for, anything if it even suggests it can pair them up.

How to find the right romantic partner. Because I create work for single women, right? And that’s the only thing single women are allowed to care about, right? The association of single women with lack is so immediate that one need not read even one sentence of description about my work—why bother? Single women? Oooh! You must want to talk about boys!

My podcast is one place on earth trying to unravel the necklace knot that’s kept singles vulnerable for generations at a time. I discuss singlehood through a lens of logic, actual experience…

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