Couples On Sidewalks Must Be Stopped

Do you want to play Red Rover? Because we’re gonna.

Photo by the agitated author.

In order to understand this very specific brand of strife, one must meet certain criteria. You must live in a city. The older the city, the better, as they’re prone to narrow streets. You must not own a car. Cars imply that you have a way to transport your body from point A to point B without the use of your legs, feet, or personal mobility device…